Reasons why Commissario Montalbano is my ideal man

He is Italian: I enjoy speaking Italian.

He is a strong swimmer, therefore capable of rescuing me in a vast number of dangerous situations near water: One can never be too cautious.

He lives in a beautiful, open plan house by the sea, in Italy: I am not opposed to any of the aforementioned things.

When he’s not out solving crimes, he enjoys a quiet, civilised night in with a glass of wine on his balcony: I would also enjoy this.

He never fails in solving the crimes: I like to think I would be most helpful in solving said crimes.

He doesn’t beat around the bush: I don’t enjoy waffle, so this would work well.

He always sticks to his morals, even if it means disobeying the law: I like a man who has principles.

He enjoys his food: So do I.

He never speaks during meals: I am definitely most capable of talking enough for both us, at all times.

Despite being relatively short, bald and kind of old, I find him very attractive. It must be the Italian charm.

What’s more, we look pretty good together:

Image

Just to be clear, I’m not referring to the actor, Luca Zingaretti, although I am sure he is a lovely man. I, however, would like to marry Montalbano. Grazie mille.

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